So... I'm just wondering how many here realize that the D810, D800, and D750 already have every single one of those features...
Or perhaps that's the point - everyone here wants what Nikon already offers? Either way, it's kind of funny
Why is this insightful or funny? It's human nature to want what someone else already has. Or perhaps you're making the standard Nikon fanboi error of assuming that the body is the entire system. My guess is that a lot of Nikonians want what Canon already offers: great selection of lenses and accessories and high manufacturing quality (*cough* D610 *cough*). And the D810 is clearly a nod toward the 5D3's strength as an event camera.
Ideally, I'd like to be able to select the best components from each brand, but proprietary mounts and connections force us into brand lock-in. Depending on your particular style of photography, either Nikon or Canon will serve your needs better, but there's no harm or shame in wishing for it all.