« on: May 07, 2013, 08:31:00 PM »
Popular car maker Honda announced today that it will stop making such popular cars as the Civic, Accord and Odyssey, and will begin producing only one vehicle: a super stretch limousine. Honda's press release states that its customers will actually break even, or possibly come out ahead. This calculation assumes that the customer would have purchased one new model of each of the 11 different vehicles Honda makes every year, and would of course have crushed all its previous-year Hondas into metal cubes for recycling every year.
Critics point out that very few existing Honda customers actually buy a whole fleet of Hondas each year, as it would be cost-prohibitive and also more vehicles than any one person would typically use. Most people, consumer advocates contend, would only purchase one or two Honda models, and would ordinarily hold onto them somewhat longer.
As an added incentive, each of the new hulking 40-person limousines comes with a large, roomy 6' x 12' U-haul trailer to tow behind the enormous limousines, for useful storage.
Honda dismisses criticism as short-sighted, and "the grumbling of a lot of low-value casual drivers of one or two vehicles", as they pursue their more-valued top 2% customers. When asked for comment, representatives from Ford, GM, Nissan, Toyota and Chrysler all said they would be happy to welcome the discarded 98% of Honda's customer base into a dealership to view their own selection of much lower-priced, and individually-available vehicles.