The lighting is really harsh and unnatural looking. You said you had the light in an umbrella- was it really far from your subject? A poster above said to move it further away from your subject, that is actually wrong. You want it as close as possible to your subject. The further away the light is, the smaller the light source is in comparison to your subject, and the harsher the light will become. Put light almost in frame.
(Note: Unless you were going for a harsh/ horror effect)
I'd start with one flash on a light stand with a shoot through umbrella (to camera left or right), slightly above and angled down on subject.
Also read this:http://strobist.blogspot.com/
The crop is also odd in that it looks like there is a wax hand stuck to this guy's chin! I'd hold off on trying to add hands into the frame till you nail the other aspects.
On the good side, your subject looks totally comfortable being photographed by you, and that is 90% of the challenge.