« on: January 28, 2015, 10:58:28 PM »
Canon: All right. Who makes the sensor? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you decide and we both take pictures, and find out who has Canon... and who has Sony.
Rumours guy: But it's so simple. All I have to do is divine from what I know of you: are you the sort of man who would put the sensor into his own camera or his enemy's? Now, a clever man would put the sensor into his own camera, because he would know that only a great fool would reach for what he was given. I am not a great fool, so I can clearly not choose the camera in front of you. But you must have known I was not a great fool, you would have counted on it, so I can clearly not choose the camera in front of me.
Canon: You've made your decision then?
Rumours guy: Not remotely. Because sony sensors are designed in Australia, as everyone knows, and Australia is entirely peopled with criminals, and criminals are used to having people not trust them, as you are not trusted by me, so I can clearly not choose the camera in front of you.
Canon: Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.
Rumours guy: Wait till I get going! Now, where was I?
Rumours guy: Yes, Australia. And you must have suspected I would have known the sensor's origin, so I can clearly not choose the camera in front of me.
Canon: You're just stalling now.
Rumours guy: You'd like to think that, wouldn't you? You've shot with a 1DX and 1200F5.6, which means you're exceptionally strong, so you could've put the sensor in your own camera, trusting on your strength to save you, so I can clearly not choose the camera in front of you. But, you've also bested my Tamron, which means you must have studied, and in studying you must have learned that man is mortal, so you would have put the sensor as far from yourself as possible, so I can clearly not choose the camera in front of me.
Canon: You're trying to trick me into giving away something. It won't work.
Rumours guy: IT HAS WORKED! YOU'VE GIVEN EVERYTHING AWAY! I KNOW WHAT THE sensor IS!
Canon: Then make your choice.
Rumours guy: I will, and I choose - IS THAT A NEW PHOTOSHOP RELEASE?
Canon: [Rumours guy gestures up and away from the table. Canon Exec looks. Rumours guy swaps the cameras]
Canon: What? Where? I don't see anything.
Rumours guy: Well, I- I could have sworn I saw an upgrade. No matter. First, let's shoot. Me from my camera, and you from yours.
Canon, Rumours guy: [Rumours guy and the Canon exec shoot]
Canon: You guessed wrong.
Rumours guy: You only think I guessed wrong! That's what's so funny! I switched cameras when your back was turned! Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders - The most famous of which is "never get involved in a land war in Asia" - but only slightly less well-known is this: "Never go in against a Sicilian when photography is on the line"! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha...
Rumours guy: [Rumours guy stops suddenly, his smile frozen on his face and falls to the ground dead]
Neuro: And to think, all that time it was your camera that had a canon sensor.
Canon: They were both canon sensors. Sony is building to our design.