Letter to Mr Rockwell in regards to his 5Dmkiii review

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D_Rochat said:
[quote author=Ken "I'm awesome" Rockwell]
After shooting another day with my 5D Mark III, I am so digging it. Its magic in-camera lens correction is letting me shoot fly-weight plastic Canon lenses, like my weightless and ergonomically superior 20-35mm f/3.5-4.5, getting great results, and lightening my load, all at the same time.

You know, right before the release of the 5D mkIII I said to myself, "I really hope Ken tests and reviews this $3500 camera with sh*tty lenses".

I really hope he tests the 1Dx with the ef 75-300.
[/quote]
i have a 28-90 I can lend him if he cant afford one for the review
 
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wickidwombat said:
D_Rochat said:
Ken Rockwell doesn't do post processing. He gets it right in the camera, or so he claims.
translation = Hasn't figured out how to change from jpg to RAW yet

still waiting for @lex's next letter letting him in on that little gem ;)

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris Ken Rockwell been there with his D800. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

Chuck Norris Ken Rockwell doesn't read books 5D3 manuals, he just stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them.

The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick Ken Rockwell camera review. They didn't even come close.

and so on...
 
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marekjoz said:
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris Ken Rockwell been there with his D800. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

And here I was thinking it was greener because someone turned up the saturation. Silly me.

DJL329 said:
@!ex said:
Just an update. No response to my email, and no changes to his misinformed website. If I ran a website that reviewed gear for a living and I got an email pointing out a bunch of clear and glaring mistakes on said website, I'm pretty sure I would be pretty quick to respond and update the site, although I'm not a technologically inept tool with a website designed in the late 90's.

Perhaps you should read Ken Rockwell's "manual":

http://www.kenrockwell.com/about.htm

It is a work of fiction, entirely the product of my own imagination. This website is my personal opinion. To use words of Ansel Adams on page 193 of his autobiography, this site is my "aggressive personal opinion," and not a "logical presentation of fact."

I have the energy and sense of humor of a three-year old, so remember, this is a personal website, and never presented as fact. I enjoy making things up for fun, as does The Onion, and I publish them here — even on this page.

Therefore, if you are reading his page and making the mistake of taking him seriously, then you're the one with the problem.

If you are looking for site with serious reviews, then look somewhere else. End of discussion.

now, see, usually, a disclaimer like that should be upfront and seen, not hidden in the about page. If he can find place to make it so obvious that he needs help to feed his growing family, he can surely fit that in somewhere....
 
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marekjoz said:
wickidwombat said:
D_Rochat said:
Ken Rockwell doesn't do post processing. He gets it right in the camera, or so he claims.
translation = Hasn't figured out how to change from jpg to RAW yet

still waiting for @lex's next letter letting him in on that little gem ;)

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris Ken Rockwell been there with his D800. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

Chuck Norris Ken Rockwell doesn't read books 5D3 manuals, he just stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them.

The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick Ken Rockwell camera review. They didn't even come close.

and so on...


Awesome, I hope this thread lives forever...

Ken Rockwell lives forever - You really want to know what happened to the dinosaurs? One of them made fun of Ken Rockwell's fanny pack.
 
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D_Rochat said:
DSC_5572-1200.jpg
 
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wickidwombat said:
@!ex said:
wickidwombat said:
I've never seen anyone co-ordinate their wardrobe with their teeth before :o

It's late, and am defending my dissertation on Friday so I should be asleep, but I just lost my S___ on that comment.
Sorry I was wrong, this guy does too

T.H.E. (The Hardest Ever) | Official Video HD

I picked up the nuance of the "defending my thesis" lyrics, nice. Also WTF has Wyclef been up too, oh ya, running for president.
 
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@!ex said:
wickidwombat said:
@!ex said:
wickidwombat said:
I've never seen anyone co-ordinate their wardrobe with their teeth before :o

It's late, and am defending my dissertation on Friday so I should be asleep, but I just lost my S___ on that comment.
Sorry I was wrong, this guy does too

T.H.E. (The Hardest Ever) | Official Video HD

I picked up the nuance of the "defending my thesis" lyrics, nice. Also WTF has Wyclef been up too, oh ya, running for president.


Will.I.am?
 
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Who would win in a fist fight

Ken Rockwell or Chuck Norris?

I think it's obvious if they actually got down to it that Chuck would, but I'll wager Ken would be telling him his technique is all wrong :)

ET
 
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Originally comaprison to Chuck Norris came yesterday to my mind, but today I googled and found that somene did it already 5 years ago! That's long but really great and still so close :)

Quote from flickr: http://www.flickr.com/groups/nikondigital/discuss/72157600003338158/

"chad™ [deleted] says:

For a couple long hours, the folks on freenode.net's #photogeeks IRC channel dropped lines about Ken Rockwell, the photographer/blogger we love to hate.

We created these morsels along the same vein as the infamous Chuck Norris Facts, I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

Ken Rockwell Facts

Contributed by liem, Epic|, Fufie, michel_v, neom, Wintre, Bas|k, lament, mattsteg__ and pal.

* Ken Rockwell is the Chuck Norris of photography

* Ken Rockwell's camera has similar settings to ours, except his are: P[erfect] Av[Awesome Priority Tv[Totally Awesome Priority] M[ajestic]

* Ken Rockwell doesn't color correct. He adjusts your world to match his.

* Sure, Ken Rockwell deletes a bad photo or two. Other people call these Pulitzers.

* Ken Rockwell doesn't adjust his DOF, he changes space-time.

* Circle of confusion? You might be confused. Ken Rockwell never is.

* Ken Rockwell doesn't wait for the light when he shoots a landscape - the light waits for him.

* Ken Rockwell never flips his camera in portrait position, he flips the earth

* Ken Rockwell ordered an L-lens from Nikon, and got one.

* Ken Rockwell is the only person to have photographed Jesus; unfortunately he ran out of film and had to use a piece of cloth instead.

* When Ken Rockwell brackets a shot, the three versions of the photo win first place in three different categories

* Before Nikon or Canon releases a camera they go to Ken and they ask him to test them, the best cameras get a Nikon sticker and the less good get a Canon sticker

* Once Ken tested a camera, he said I cant even put Canon on this one,thats how Pentax was born

* Rockwellian policy isn't doublethink - Ken doesn't even need to think once

* Ken Rockwell doesn't use flash ever since the Nagasaki incident.

* Only Ken Rockwell can take pictures of Ken Rockwell; everyone else would just get their film overexposed by the light of his genius

* Ken Rockwell wanted something to distract the lesser photographers, and lo, there were ducks.

* Ken Rockwell is the only one who can take self-portraits of you

* Ken Rockwell's nudes were fully clothed at the time of exposure

* Ken Rockwell once designed a zoom lens. You know it as the Hubble SpaceTelescope.

* When Ken unpacks his CF card, it already has masterpieces on it.

* Rockwell portraits are so lifelike, they have to pay taxes

* On Ken Rockwell's desktop, the Trash Icon is really a link to National Geographic Magazine

* Ken Rockwell spells point-and-shoot "h-a-s-s-e-l-b-l-a-d"

* When Ken Rockwell went digital, National Geographic nearly went out of business because he was no longer phyically discarding photos

* For every 10 shots that Ken Rockwell takes, 11 are keepers.

* Ken Rockwell's digital files consist of 0's, 1's AND 2's.

* Ken Rockwell never focus, everything moves into his DoF

* Ken Rockwell's shots are so perfect, Adobe redesigned photoshop for him: all it consists of is a close button.

* The term tripod was coined after his silhouette

* Ken Rockwell never produces awful work, only work too advanced for the viewer

* A certain braind of hig-end cameras was named after people noticed the quality was a lot "like a" rockwell

* Ken Rockwell isn't the Chuck Norris of photography; Chuck Norris is the Ken Rockwell of martial arts.

* Ken Rockwell never starts, he continues"
 
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marekjoz said:
* Only Ken Rockwell can take pictures of Ken Rockwell; everyone else would just get their film overexposed by the light of his genius

* Ken Rockwell isn't the Chuck Norris of photography; Chuck Norris is the Ken Rockwell of martial arts.

:D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D

I'll add my own:

Ken Rockwell's images aren't overly saturated; he just sees the world more vividly than anyone else.
 
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