Here's my opinion, as a woman who owns many purses and several camera bags:
I think you have competing priorities here. You say you want something that is small but also doesn't look like a camera bag. I really don't think you can do both. IMHO, if you get a bag that only fits your camera with one lens, it's going to suggest you have a camera in it no matter what it looks like. The reason for this is the 3 to 4" front to back depth needed to accommodate a camera. If the front to back depth were only an inch or two, what you are otherwise describing would be known as a man purse. But carrying something that's more on the boxy side, you're advertising that what you have inside of it is a camera. Other than to hold lunch, why else would you need anything so thick for an otherwise small bag? I think this is why many people are suggesting something more along the lines of a scaled-down messenger bag. A messenger bag could hold papers or magazines or books. All sorts of stuff. Again, as a woman who carries a lot of bags, and pays attention to other people's bags, if I see you carry what you're describing, I'm going to think camera inside.
I think you have competing priorities here. You say you want something that is small but also doesn't look like a camera bag. I really don't think you can do both. IMHO, if you get a bag that only fits your camera with one lens, it's going to suggest you have a camera in it no matter what it looks like. The reason for this is the 3 to 4" front to back depth needed to accommodate a camera. If the front to back depth were only an inch or two, what you are otherwise describing would be known as a man purse. But carrying something that's more on the boxy side, you're advertising that what you have inside of it is a camera. Other than to hold lunch, why else would you need anything so thick for an otherwise small bag? I think this is why many people are suggesting something more along the lines of a scaled-down messenger bag. A messenger bag could hold papers or magazines or books. All sorts of stuff. Again, as a woman who carries a lot of bags, and pays attention to other people's bags, if I see you carry what you're describing, I'm going to think camera inside.
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